Discovering Your Core Values: A Practical Guide to Making Better Decisions

In a world full of choices and competing priorities, how do you know which path to take?

An answer lies in understanding your core values—the fundamental beliefs that guide your decisions and shape your life.

When you have clarity about what truly matters to you, decision-making becomes more intuitive, and your overall sense of fulfilment increases.

Prompt: A diverse person exploring their core values to allow them to make better decisions in life.

Why Core Values Matter

Having clear core values helps you:

• Navigate complex decisions when faced with multiple options

• Enhance your well-being by living in alignment with what truly matters to you

• Find success in both personal and professional contexts

• Prioritise effectively by focusing on what's genuinely important

• Create intentional impact on the people and world around you

Most of us have never taken the time to explicitly define our values. Instead, we operate on autopilot, making choices based on external expectations or immediate needs.

This practical guide will walk you through a process to uncover and articulate your core values.

The way I think about my core values is that they literally ground me.

I imagine that each of my two core values lives in one of my legs.

When I stand strong and confident on my two feet, I can make grounded decisions that support me and move me forward in the right direction.

A Step-by-Step Process to Define Your Core Values

1. Reflect on Important Life Moments

Start by reflecting on times when you felt most aligned with yourself—moments when you were "in flow" or felt particularly proud, fulfilled or at peace.

Consider these questions to identify these key moments:

• What moments gave me great joy when I was a child / young adult / adult?

• What happened when everything felt right?

• What did I do when things were challenging and they turned out OK?

• What events felt agonising and challenging - how did I want them to be different?

• What happened when I made big decisions that lead to great outcomes?

• What moments crossed my red lines?

Action steps:

1. Write short stories about these peak experiences

2. Include details about what happened, who was involved and the outcome

3. Explore how these experiences made you and others feel

Take time to reflect on these moments - maybe let your stories rest for a few days and then come back to them.

When you are ready, have a look for patterns - are there repeating situations that are particularly meaningful to you?

2. Identify Resonant Terms

When you reflect on your meaningful events, you may find emergent patterns that hint at your core values.

It can be helpful at this stage to expose yourself to a wide range of potential values to see which ones naturally resonate with you.

Action steps:

Review the list of value terms (see the appendix at the end of this post):

1. Intuitively select the ones that immediately stand out to you

2. Review your selections and eliminate terms that feel less essential

3. Consolidate overlapping values until you have 2-3 core values - you might find that some of your chosen value are intrinsically included in another one

The goal is to distill your list down to two or three fundamental values that encompass what matters most to you.

Remember, this isn't about choosing "good" values—it's about identifying what genuinely resonates with you.

3. Craft Your Core Value Story

Now, articulate what these values mean in your life by creating a personal value statement.

Action steps:

For each core value, write a few sentences describing:

1. How this value has shown up in your life

2. The positive outcomes when you've honoured this value

3. How you intend to embody this value going forward

You might find it helpful following this template:

"In my life, [Core Value] has guided me in [Relevant Situations]. When I lean into [Core Value], the outcomes have been [Significant Outcomes]. I will use [Core Value] going forward so that [What It Will Lead To]."

For example:

"In my life, courage has guided me in speaking up for myself and others, pursuing new opportunities despite uncertainty, and facing difficult conversations head-on.

When I lean into courage, the outcomes have been deeper relationships, personal growth, and creating positive change in my community.

I will use courage going forward so that I can live without regret and inspire others to overcome their fears."

Putting Your Values Into Practice

Congratulations - establishing your core values is a big step forward.

It’s now time to integrate them into your daily life and decision-making process.

Share Your Values

Discuss your core values with trusted friends and colleagues.

Invite them to ask questions about why these values matter to you. This not only strengthens your commitment but also helps others understand what drives you.

Use Values in Decision-Making

When facing important decisions, take a pause before deciding:

1. Reflect on how all options align with your core values

2. Consider writing a short story exploring how each value might influence your choice

3. If possible, discuss your thinking with someone who can ask thoughtful questions about how different choices align with your values

Living Your Values

Start small by looking for daily opportunities to express your values. Over time, you'll find that making decisions becomes easier, your sense of purpose grows stronger, and your impact on others becomes more intentional.

Your core values aren't static—they may evolve as you grow and gain new experiences. Revisit this exercise periodically to ensure your stated values still reflect what matters most to you.

By living in alignment with your core values, you'll not only make better decisions but also experience greater satisfaction, authenticity and meaning in all areas of your life.

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Appendix: List of Values

As you read through this list of potential values, mark the ones that immediately resonate with you without overthinking. Then, go back through your selections and begin the process of narrowing them down.

Remember that this list is not exhaustive, and you may identify values that aren't included here. The goal is to discover what genuinely matters to you, not to choose what you think you "should" value.

Personal Character Values

• Accountability

• Accuracy

• Achievement

• Adaptability

• Adventurousness

• Ambition

• Assertiveness

• Authenticity

• Balance

• Beauty

• Boldness

• Bravery

• Calmness

• Carefulness

• Challenge

• Cheerfulness

• Clarity

• Commitment

• Compassion

• Confidence

• Conscientiousness

• Consideration

• Consistency

• Contentment

• Contribution

• Cooperation

• Courage

• Creativity

• Curiosity

• Decisiveness

• Determination

• Dignity

• Discipline

• Discovery

• Diversity

• Efficiency

• Elegance

• Empathy

• Enjoyment

• Enthusiasm

• Excellence

• Experience

• Exploration

• Expressiveness

• Fairness

• Faith

• Fidelity

• Fitness

• Flexibility

• Focus

• Forgiveness

• Freedom

• Frugality

• Fun

• Generosity

• Gentleness

• Grace

• Gratitude

• Growth

• Happiness

• Harmony

• Health

• Helpfulness

• Honesty

• Honor

• Humility

• Humor

• Imagination

• Independence

• Individuality

• Innovation

• Inspiration

• Integrity

• Intelligence

• Intuition

• Joy

• Justice

• Kindness

• Knowledge

• Leadership

• Learning

• Love

• Loyalty

• Mastery

• Mindfulness

• Moderation

• Motivation

• Openness

• Optimism

• Order

• Organization

• Originality

• Passion

• Patience

• Peace

• Perseverance

• Persistence

• Playfulness

• Poise

• Precision

• Preparedness

• Professionalism

• Prudence

• Purpose

• Quality

• Reliability

• Resilience

• Resourcefulness

• Respect

• Responsibility

• Restraint

• Risk-taking

• Romance

• Safety

• Security

• Self-control

• Self-reliance

• Selflessness

• Serenity

• Service

• Simplicity

• Sincerity

• Skilfulness

• Solitude

• Spirituality

• Spontaneity

• Stability

• Strength

• Structure

• Success

• Support

• Sustainability

• Thankfulness

• Thoroughness

• Thoughtfulness

• Timeliness

• Tolerance

• Tradition

• Tranquility

• Transparency

• Trust

• Trustworthiness

• Understanding

• Uniqueness

• Unity

• Variety

• Vitality

• Warmth

• Wealth

• Welcoming

• Well-being

• Wholeheartedness

• Wisdom

• Wonder

• Zeal

Interpersonal Values

• Acceptance

• Appreciation

• Belonging

• Care

• Collaboration

• Community

• Connection

• Courtesy

• Dependability

• Devotion

• Empowerment

• Encouragement

• Equality

• Familiarity

• Family

• Fellowship

• Friendship

• Guidance

• Harmony

• Hospitality

• Inclusivity

• Intimacy

• Involvement

• Kinship

• Mentorship

• Nurturing

• Partnership

• Recognition

• Relationship

• Respect

• Responsiveness

• Solidarity

• Support

• Teamwork

• Togetherness

• Understanding

Professional Values

• Achievement

• Advancement

• Competence

• Competition

• Competitiveness

• Detail-orientation

• Diligence

• Effectiveness

• Efficiency

• Entrepreneurship

• Excellence

• Expertise

• Impact

• Improvement

• Industriousness

• Influence

• Initiative

• Merit

• Performance

• Practicality

• Productivity

• Professionalism

• Progress

• Punctuality

• Quality

• Recognition

• Results

• Skill

• Success

• Teamwork

• Thoroughness

• Timeliness

Societal Values

• Altruism

• Charity

• Citizenship

• Civic duty

• Community

• Conservation

• Contribution

• Democracy

• Diversity

• Environmentalism

• Equality

• Equity

• Ethics

• Fairness

• Freedom

• Global perspective

• Humanitarianism

• Justice

• Legacy

• Opportunity

• Patriotism

• Peace

• Philanthropy

• Public service

• Responsibility

• Social justice

• Stewardship

• Sustainability

• Tolerance

• Tradition

• Volunteering

Intellectual Values

• Analysis

• Clarity

• Competence

• Contemplation

• Creativity

• Critical thinking

• Curiosity

• Education

• Foresight

• Imagination

• Information

• Innovation

• Insight

• Intelligence

• Investigation

• Knowledge

• Learning

• Logic

• Open-mindedness

• Perception

• Questioning

• Rationality

• Reason

• Reflection

• Research

• Resourcefulness

• Scholarship

• Scrutiny

• Thinking

• Truth

• Understanding

• Wisdom